Broken Promises

I promised not to. I’m sorry I did. I couldn't handle it. I sat there doing my homework trying not to cry onto my laptop. I got to print it. The printer breaks. My mom yells at me like i broke it. She tells me that I need a nap. To quit being stressed over my girlfriend. She was wrong. There was so much more wrong with me. Completely different than what she thinks. She continues to tell me how I’ll go to bed oblivious to me slowly tracing my scars with my finger as she talks. She won’t stop so i lose it. I scream at her how there is so much more going on in my head than she knows. I end up tell her the surface of how i can’t have the one thing I want so much more than anything and how it feels like it’s killing me. When it literally is. I runaway to my room and break into tears after thinking about it for that long. I keep crying and crying. My shirt is soaked now I can’t do this. Why do I love her so much that I react like this Why?! I’m sorry, I have to break the promise. I pick up the razor, “I’m sorry *Slash* I’m sorry *Slash* I’m sorry *cut* I’m sorry…